“Acceptance doesn’t mean resignation. It means understanding that something is what it is and that there has to be a way through it.” Michael J. Fox
Michael J. Fox is an inspiration to me and to many and I am so happy to see the thought he added to the phrase: “…it is what it is,” –THAT “there has to be a way through it.”
That phrase, “it is what it is,” has irritated me since about 2010, when it seemed to permeate many conversations that I was either having or topics that were being discussed by others. It seemed so definite and defining and I guess I am the type of person that cannot readily accept things as permanent or without possibility. I would say I am not one to follow the “status quo.” It doesn’t mean that I cannot accept some things, such as the manner in which the sun rises or set. It does mean that when something seems to be an irritation or an injustice, it bugs the hell out of me that I can not do something to improve it or that we cannot at least discuss possibilities. I do not think that makes me a “negative person” because I get so upset with that idea of “it is what it is.” One reason I get upset is that when someone says that to me it expresses a finality and that I “should just get over it and move on.” Ignoring an injustice is not something I can do easily. If anything, I am hopeful that things can be better!
“There has to be a way through it” expresses to me that there are countless possibilities. No matter how bad a situation, no matter how difficult the experience, there is a way out or forward. If one approach does not work, we can try another. Not giving up on possibilities is being hopeful and optimistic. Not giving up on others, no matter how many times they have done every possible thing to drive you down into the valley, there is always the hill that can be climbed to new heights.
Lately, our country is experiencing many soul-stretching boundaries. We have to look at our beliefs and what we actually live and breathe. With every spurt of growth there is a little pain. We have to keep on hoping in ourselves, in one another, and in the common good of humanity. I know I fail at this many times. but each day I wake up and have to try again and not give up or say “it is what it is.” No, I must add, “there is a way through it” and continue with HOPEFUL ACTION.
Written by my Granddaughter, Nadia, when she was 4 years young! (January 12, 2014 at 17:39:32)
I love this photo of her! The love glows in her face…such a beautiful, free soul…such a whimsical gaze!
With your eyes so bright on me
You will be my Sweetie
We will swing on a star
And you will be my car
for Lily Elizabeth Brooks
My New Granddaughter
5 Months into this world!
i look upon your face
your gentleness does not escape
warmth and kindness in your grin
lovely, lovely welcoming in
your eyes follow my every move
my love for you I will prove
soaking in the tone of my voice
love from me is the only choice
the touch of your tiny finger to my hand
sends a message deep for all I stand
Lily, you are gift beyond measure
In my heart you will always be my treasure
old Picket Bridge, built sturdy and strong
many moons ago is the history’s song
with Whatcom Creek rushing below
the soldiers marched to and fro
different feet from various walks of life
trod upon it day and night
the years flew by as did the time
still the bridge stood ever so sublime
today its purpose is doublefold
the only home for the humble-souled
the pavement is laid and so are the planks
people using it without asking their rank
sheltering the homeless safely underneath
in the cold they sleep with shattering teeth
progress they say has come our way
yet so many are left with no place to stay
a person who has the job to watch over something very carefully and record your results over a period of time
Have We Become a Culture of Monitors?
Picture these events:
We go to our doctor appointment and the nurse monitors our blood pressure. Up and down and around we go.We go to our doctor and we tell her or him our symptoms and she or he tells us to watch ourselves very closely. (I have already been watching myself closely, that is WHY I am here!) If your toe develops a green color, you may have gangrene and then we can cut if off. Monitor your foot!
We go to Church, and the priest tells us to monitor our behavior. We go to our financial advisor, (in my case, that is my alter ego and my checkbook) and he is monitoring our situation. We go into a bank, and the safety officers are monitoring the comings and goings of various individuals. We watch the highway workers who are monitoring how many accidents occur on the corner without the Stop Sign. We have to wait until a certain number of deaths occur before we install the Stop Sign. After all, what is one human life in our world of a billion plus?
We know the amount of clutter in our garages and basements have the potential for a fire, but we are monitoring the situation and continue to watch the collection grow! We are monitoring the situation.
We know that if we changed one thing in the classroom, such as taking the time to speak to the child as a person, we might just be the only adult who is coming into the child’s life, listening to that child. However, we have tests to correct and forms to fill out to hand into the Principal daily so that he “knows” we are “doing the job!” He is monitoring the paper situation.
Then we have the judge in the courtroom, and we know that alcohol is used daily by the defendant. The judge says he will monitor the situation, by allowing the abuser to spend a night in jail for observation, while the court clerk takes the fine and builds the prison fund so that his friend who sells to the prisons, will garner a profit. The next day, the alcoholic allowed home, becomes father of the year and beats his children once more. But, hey, the judge, the court system, the Social Service System, the Guardian ad Litem have all done their perfect paper recording job. What else do we want? Children are property– written into law since the Founding Fathers. Who knew?
We are monitoring the situation. We are a Guardian ad Litem, and we collect our $120 per court appearance, read the information, and monitor the situation. We do the perfunctory requirements of our office, but do we actually care what happens to the lives of those children? What do we actually do besides fill out forms and file papers?
We have a widow neighbor living next door, and we talk among ourselves how lonely life is for her now that her children have moved on with their lives and her husband has died. We monitor the situation. Do we think we might invite her over for coffee? Do we think we might offer her a ride to the store? Do you think we might give her a phone call? No, that would be meddling in other people’s business.
How is that the man who lived here for 14 years in our subdivision, and then died in a tragic train accident, and we didn’t know it? How is it we do not know each other any more? How is it that the single Mom only gets nasty letters in her mailbox and not one can offer a listening ear or a hand of help when one of the four children loses her way?But we are monitoring our neighbors offenses, I am sure.
So, we continue to monitor the situation. Our bridges are collapsing (remember the horrific deaths when the Minnesota Bridge 9340 met its demise, killing 13 people and injuring 145?) literally!
Our bridges to each other are fragile if they exist at all. We are too busy building walls and fences, rather than a pathway of help.
We have more monitors in this country than anywhere in the world!
Why do we wait for a crisis to occur before we take action?
Isn’t it better to avert destruction, rather than sit and watch the issue continue to fester?
Where have all the DOERS gone?
When and where does action take place?
Do we have to wait for blood to be shed?
When do we go beyond monitoring to action?
Do we just wait for everything to collapse and fall apart?
Whose responsibility is it, if not ours?
Yes, I am sure there are many good people, many good holy people, many good teachers, many good Principals. many good Social Workers, many good Guardian ad Litems, many good judges, many good bridge builders in our country. We just need MORE Doers!
Who of us will apply for the job? Who of us will be a DOER and not just a monitor?
I have my eye on you…
I am monitoring YOU!!!!!!!