friends for fifty-two years

then one day

you wake up

and you are airbrushed out of their life

no warning

no hint of friendship lost

did you really know the other

then the memories flood in

you think was it all for naught

you fight for its meaning

its relevance

where did the truth in it lie

how does one just walk away

no explanation

just silence

and once again

we are drawn into the abyss

searching for God to answer

well-meaning people will say

“she is on her own journey,

just leave it be…”

but they are not feeling what I am feeling

the gift that was lost

how did I fail

did I not honor friendship

what happened to loyalty

Jonathan and David is etched in my mind

well-meaning people will say

“get over it…move on”

many are uncomfortable with another person’s sorrow

and, so, I am left alone

until another tomorrow

Copyright ©Jane H. Johann, 2016 "Bellingham As the Sun Goes Down"...facing the San Juan Islands.

©Jane H. Johann, 2016
“Bellingham As the Sun Goes Down”…facing the San Juan Islands.





24 thoughts on “airbrush

  1. bwcarey says:

    perhaps they moved ahead to show you the way, love has to give to survive, amen


    • yes…that is a possibility…however, the person has become a recluse—shutting out everyone…I still am here, always waiting for the return…And, yes, I can even learn from that position of being. Allowing her to be a recluse–to be in her space, if that is what she needs…it is an absence clearly felt.


  2. v4vikey says:



  3. Mr. Militant Negro says:

    Reblogged this on The Militant Negro™ and commented:
    A new, to me, blogger with magnificent talent. Check out this blog.


  4. Princess Aurora says:

    Thats hard. Its such a shock when there is no explanation, no room for understanding. Im sorry for the friendship come and gone you thought you had. That is a long time. Do not look at it as your doing. I feel you are honest genuine and kindhearted. Maybe your own vulnerabilities and truth has made that person shut down to search inside themselves. maybe youve grown and they have not. However its still a hard loss to encounter. take your memories and wish them well in your head and maybe in the future who knows.


  5. reocochran says:

    Just sending you hugs, Jane. I am at the library and hard to process when there is a young man playing a video game and he is making little noises. I am smiling at him but saddened by your loss. Take it easy, friend. ❤


    • dear Robin~ thank you for your kind thoughts and wishes…It has been over two years since the living departure…each day is a little easier. When we choose to be a friend, when we choose to love, we have to accept that loss will eventually come and accept that as part of the deal in our loving, ne c’est pas? It doesn’t take away from what was…it doesn’t take away the goodness given…I think I am off writing the beginning of a new poem! You inspired me! HUGS! Jane

      Liked by 1 person

      • reocochran says:

        Oh, so glad our conversation led to a poem, Jane. Loss doesn’t really disappear but it fades and hurts less over time. . .
        p.s. I love the French, which I had 1 year of, 8 years of Spanish. Yes, I do understand and see. . .


      • Thank you for the inspiration of “Airbrush!” We do need each other on WordPress! and in life. I get so much good from this site! and have met very good people, like yourself. Robin! I am always trying to learn French. I understand basic French from my days in the convent, back 40 years. But I only know a few phrases. I took German in the university! LOL–why, I don’t know! I suppose because of my German background. In any case, I have purchased Rosetta Stone and need to crack it open and seriously study the French language. I am anticipating a need for being able to speak it. There is a French language group in Milwaukee that practices speaking with each other—I am thinking of joining it this summer. It is an hour trip–now that the roads are clear, maybe I will drum up the courage! Have a great day! Thank you for your visits, Robin!


  6. cherylfoston says:

    I enjoyed this poem very much. It really resonated with me. Thank you, for sharing!


  7. Andy Smart says:

    People come and go like the wind. At the end of the day we have to move with it. Wonderful heartfelt post though I’m through with getting upset when people suddenly aren’t there any more. Phew I just realised how many posts you have!!!!!


    • Yes, you are correct…life is a series of arrivals and departures! C’est la vie! You made me laugh when you wrote: “I just realize how many posts you have”—it is small, compared to many! I have been on WordPress since October of 2011. Many others that were on here prior to me, have published their writings…I haven’t…except for one very small short story…1 1/2 pages! LOL I do not have the money to do so, but even of I did, I do not think my writing is particularly unique, compared to those I have had the blessings to read on here.

      Liked by 1 person

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