“All that we love deeply becomes a part of us.”

                                                         -Helen Keller

Love is the deepest and purest when it is freely given and received. It seems so many are afraid of openness. So many are afraid of love. Love enhances us and those we love. How can there be a limit to love?

The more open we are, of course, the more vulnerable we become. But the flip side is, if we are open the more we are truly ourselves and love who we are.  We are open because we accept our limitations and gifts.  We have nothing to fear and nothing to hide.  Love only increases within us and makes us Light Beings to others when we are open and receptive…and the more we can love those around us.  Loving one person does not limit loving others. If we do not measure our love or the love someone has for us, there is plenty of love to go around.  When we become possessive or jealous, we are measuring love. When we begin to measure love, we stifle it or kill it.  Measurement doesn’t come into the equation…we just need to love love and let it be.

Loving is not always easy. Sometimes those we love hurt us and sometimes hurt us deeply. That is the test of our true love–when we can walk through that hurt and still love and care about the person.  We are all human; we all make mistakes –I guess that is how people who are in major hand battle with each other, can come to the peace table, even after members of their own families have been killed by each other’s troops. Yes, that is the extreme–but does give pause for reflection.

Yet, I think how I wage my own inner battles that can be as devastating as actual combat warfare. I think of how people close to me and whom I love, can lash out with their words or actions and nearly annihilate me. That is the deepest hurt–to give love to another and then to be rejected –when deception enters the picture it becomes even harder–One begins to question one’s own sanity and motives. Self-worth is attacked and self-love struggles. Anger pops out all around–and the peace that was found in the love has gone underground. Love becomes hell. I just want to run away and hide from the world and I want everyone to leave me alone — and WHY? Because I feel like nothing again…like I do not matter to anyone or any cause or purpose. I travel to the point of WHY do I exist!

It is then that I realize my own words and actions—how out of my pain I have said things that were unkind to others…how I acted badly towards others. Sometimes I just want to quit. I think how can I ever be forgiven?

The wounds become deep and fester–I have to pick myself up and put the pieces together again. It is a process and takes time…And even after that, questions still arise. Judgments come from all around. Then I have to take it all to my meditation bench and quietly sift through it–going back to the Source of my breathing.  I have to affirm within myself that I am part of God’s loving being…I  ” live in the heart of God,” to borrow from Kahlil Gibran. It also teaches me to be more caring and loving to others, realizing how words and actions hurt. I see how I need forgiveness from others…and, so I too, must forgive.

I have to forgive myself for my own unloving ways and I have to forgive others –then I can go forward. We are all human. We all make errors in judgment. We each have our shadow side and we have to learn to love even our shadow side and forgive ourselves.

Helen Keller is quoted as saying, “All that we love deeply becomes a part of us.”

Love deepens who we are as a person and each person we love becomes a part of who we are, shaping our understanding and acceptance of humanity, within ourselves and others. With love of self, both are good side and our shadow side, comes the ability to forgive ourselves and then others.